~ THE ENLIGHTENMENT OF CANCER ~ PART X
August 25, 2015 was six years since my diagnosis of Breast Cancer and so much has changed. I cannot believe it’s been that long ago as it seems like just last year. An update:
I have gotten used to my new look, though at times they are uncomfortable and I must admit that there are times when I look in the mirror only to see someone different and not the me I remember growing up. Cancer has taken a lot from me, but given me insight on life and people;
I am now able to get checkups once a year and not every three months or every six months. Myself and my doctors here in California keep and eye on my numbers very closely. I stated in my posts that I was unsure of finding a doctor that I can really trust and feel comfortable without here, but I have (after a long and difficult search and having many trial and error with other doctors) found one that is nice and really seems to care about me and make sure I am well. And, to top it off, he has my older brother’s birthday, so it must be a sign that he’s ok;
My cousin Bobby has since passed away – God Rest His Soul! He was a fighter to the end and gave me such encouragement. I sure miss him and our talks, but I know he is here with me and guides me to enjoy this life to the best of my ability, for him as well as for myself;
Rob is always with me, he takes great care of me (we take care of each other), and still loves me for who I am. It’s hard to believe we’ve been thru so much already and he hasn’t run for the hills. I believe our experience with my diagnosis changed him as well as all those around us. I believe it opens their eyes (if they haven’t turned and run from you because you care sick – because they cannot handle it) to how precious life is and not complain about the small stuff, but just appreciate everything in life a bit more.
Breast Cancer ~ Once you have gone thru the surgeries and treatments, once your hair has grown back out and you can restart your life, it’s never really over. Once you have gone thru all of that, no one tells you or talks to you about the mental aspects of having gone thru something like this. You have to figure out how to handle seeing the new you, the new you after surgeries, after hair loss and regrowth, after changing your eating habits, and the new you with knowing that you might be Cancer free, but in the back of your head (most of the time) is that little voice saying that it feels like it’s never really gone. You pray that it is, you try to take care of yourself in a better way, and you stay up to date with your doctors. That is why it is vital to find a doctor and staff that care about their patients and not just another patient to see. There is a difference. The images stay with you forever, the feelings of that entire process stay with you, but at the end of the day you have relearned that life is a gift, being on this earth with family and friends is a gift, you are a gift.
Positivity is KEY in your life during this process and always after as well as managing your stress. You have no patience for and care to be around any negativity whether it be from family, friends, or just hearing someone on the train complaining about life or the weather when you know that it is a gift to even be here standing and breathing for that matter. You have to just walk away at that time and just breathe and pray for patience and guidance.
So, you live your life, you take chances in life, you learn new things, you travel, you enjoy your family and friends and be with them often, you live your life for yourself as well as for the loved ones who have passed and say a cheer to them daily when you have that glass of red wine. You live life and enjoy because it can be gone in an instant without a sign or a clue that it’s coming.
This is what I have learned and the way I live my life. So, here’s to you all and may you all be happy, healthy, and loved by many furry babies, family and friends.
Thank you for taking time out of your day to read my posts/blog. It and you are greatly appreciated!
Always with Light, Love, Strength, and Enlightenment! Cheers!
A couple photos I thought I’d share from a shoot in 2013 with our favorite photographer, Joshua Weinfeld. Live Life Right… 8)